And she's buying a stairway to heaven

Let me tell you something about Irene. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It's so embarrassing. I don't even... Whatever. So then in eighth grade, Katrina hit, and Irene was like, weirdly jealous of her. Like, if I would rate her a 1, and I’d rate Katrina a 3, she'd be like, "Why am I rated so low?" And I'd be like, "Why are you so obsessed with me?" So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-category 3 and up party, I was like, "Irene, I can't invite you, because you’re category 1." I mean I couldn't have a category 1 at my party. There were gonna be storms wiping out entire cities there. I mean, right? She was a CATEGORY 1. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in August, and now I guess she’s destroying the entire East Coast.

Reblog if you were born in the 90's and don't have a baby.